A Winter Break To Tenerife In The Canary Islands
Suzanne (38), Mary (58), Laura (12). We flew to Tenerife from Gatwick and stayed at the Aparthotel Columbus, Playa De Las Americas as a package deal through Thomson.
The Columbus is also the first hotel I have ever stayed in which did not have a hairdryer – So, if you are staying here, bring one! You can hire one for 15 euros at reception – if they have any left. We were wanting to buy one but the only ones we saw were in those camera shops and were roughly 100 euros Crazy.!!!! Luckily, we did find one in a “Supermarket Filipe” for about 9 euros, so snapped it up like the bargain it was.
What it did have was a metered television which you have to feed with euros! I had never seen one of these in real life – but the more I thought about it I realised that in a hotel with 500+ rooms, this has to be a good idea – if only for an environmental reason! (you made sure you didn’t leave it switched on when you went out!)
In the “public” areas, there was a large lounge, where you could sit in a dip on a saggy, stained settee and watch Eurosport if you were that way inclined. There was entertainment in the evenings consisting of “mini disco”, (or 5 year olds running around a dance floor), followed by Bingo. There was a “show” each night, but it didn’t start until 11.30pm, which is too late to be starting to watch a show when you are planning on doing something with the day to follow! Another point, the chairs in this area are also knackered and are configured in rows like a cinema, which did not exactly add any comfort or relaxation to the area.
We were self-catering, but I believe those on All Inclusive could only get drinks from one bar, and only one drink at a time (so no getting a round for your family who are at the other pool – everyone would have to line up for their one drink themselves!) I also believe the AI bar closed at 11pm – but the nightly show was not even due to start for another half an hour! Kerching!!!
We stayed in the Second block, overlooking the pool. I would imagine was the quieter of the two. The balconies on this side do not get ANY sun. But this did not bother me. What I was fed up with was there being two lifts, but only one that worked. (I was told this second lift has not been working in months)
The first block overlooking the pool gets the sun, but if you are in this first block and don’t overlook the pool, your balcony will face a very busy street, and be on top of the noisy shops and discos etc (which were not open during our visit)
I read on various forums and websites such as “Trip Advisor” about the main pool being COLD, but words cannot describe just how freezing it is! It gets hardly any sun, due to the height of the hotel buildings – I managed to get in for about 10 minutes on my first day but I didn’t bother again. It is that cold it HURTS! Another point to consider – if you are a sun worshipper, it is even more important to get your spot early – in such a shady area you have more than the sun bed reserves’ to contend with!! A handy hint would be to buy one of those blow up lilo things to lie on instead – then you can follow the sun to your heart’s content.
Another thing – if you are a light sleeper, you will need to bring some ear-plugs! The way this hotel is built, you don’t just hear your neighbours banging doors, you hear 2 whole blocks! Noise has to be expected, you are going to a party place after all – but that doesn’t mean to say you have to lose your beauty sleep does it?!
However, despite what you might think – we had a really good time in this hotel!!!
Once we had got over ourselves and our snobbery and decided to accept it for what it was – a cheap break – everything was great! The hotel staff were friendly (for Spaniards anyway) and the entertainment staff, what I saw of them, tried hard and seemed to be making efforts to get people to do things, ie volleyball (in that liquid freezer known as “the pool”, I don’t think so!), darts and so on.
In the bar, if you give a person a tip that is over 2 euros, they ring a bell – which gave me a laugh. It must be tough being a bar-person when the majority of your guests are AI and therefore not tipping you?!?!
One thing it really has going for it is its location. Columbus is near enough to everything so you can walk anywhere, but far enough up the hill so you are not plagued by noise throughout the night.
There is a roof terrace for serious sunbathers (get up early!), there are two Jacuzzis, one of which was directly above my apartment, so it served as a 6am alarm call every morning. You need to feed these with Euros, which eventually I realised was a good thing – it stops people “getting in” with you, because you have paid for it - and it stops people sitting in it too long so others can have a turn. There is a gym, a beauty parlour and a hairdressers, but I didn’t use these so I can’t offer you any opinions. The prices of the hairdresser looked very reasonable though.
The hotel has its own Supermarket, there is also a Spar just outside. You have to go to Spar – if for no other reason than to see the antithesis of Customer Service offered by the shop assistants! One in particular looks like she might kill herself if she has to serve one more person!
Further up the road is a thing called Dinomarket, which is cheaper than the Spar, and it has a lot more variety. As soon as I found Dinomarket, I didn’t go to Spar again. There is also a lovely Irish bar on the same road where I had a fabulous Fish and Chips tea - Yum Yum!
Directly across the road there is a small restaurant called Aberdeen Angus Steak House – I got a jacket potato and 2 great big pork chops for 5 Euros! We went there another day for breakfast, but that wasn’t so nice – don’t know if it was the oil they cooked in but it wasn’t my cup of tea at all. Speaking of tea, it took them 15 mins to bring one, and it was cold – and minus milk. Such a shame – but I can definitely recommend their evening menu.
So, the place……………..
Tenerife, as you probably know, is an Island full of contradiction. The north is more green as it has a bit more rainfall, the middle has the highest Mountain in Europe, Mount Teide and the highest volcano. Down “south” it is sun, sand and sangria.
Loro Parque is the “must” trip, according to their carrier bags. I agree. I had a lovely day there. Shame about the 4 hour round trip to get to it from PDLA though!
We went up the Mountain, … This trip was not good for me because all I wanted to do was go up on the cable car – like what they show on the Sky Travel shop – but after we had booked and paid for it our Thomson rep told us that she had not know of this cable car making the trip in TWO YEARS due to weather conditions… Anyway, when we got as far as the coach could take us, (after a 3 hour+ drive and stopping at every café on the way) the guide then told us the cable car (if it was working) would cost 24 euro each - the whole coach was stunned by this amount – we assumed it would be about 10 euros. But I didn’t have to fork out because surprise surprise - the cable car was not running!!! What an anticlimax!! We then christened it Mount Tedious and it cured me of my obsession with rocks!
That night we went to the Medieval night, where you get to eat a whole chicken and a baked potato with your hands! You have to wear a tabard in the colour that matched your “knight” – ours was Green and he must have been all of 17 – but we cheered him on and were gutted when he was killed! The winning knight gets the hand of the princess. The one thing I didn’t like about this evening was the queue to get a stupid picture took with the king – you had to have it done whether you wanted it or not – it was extremely rushed, and the pictures were awful! (of everyone, not just me!)
A guy next to us tried to take a photo using his own camera, and you would think he was going to be hanged for Treason. Perhaps they got carried away and thought they really were Royalty!
After this, you had to go through to a big hall where there was a stage. There was a show, consisting of acrobatic type men jumping around and there was a contortionist. I felt a bit sick, it could have been the wine – but at this stage I was glad to be going on the coach back to the Ranch.
DO NOT BUY ANYTHING FROM THE ELECTRONICS SHOPS IN THE CANARY ISLANDS, TENERIFE, GRAN CANARIA, THEY ARE ALL DODGY ROBBING B'STARDS
If you are going to Tenerife (or indeed any of the Canaries), please take this one piece of advice from me. Watch yourself in the camera shops! I am sure some are reputable, but it is not easy to tell, so err on the side of caution.
We were just generally window shopping when we saw what I thought would be a nice little gift to bring home for my husband who is a bit of a gadget lover. This was only a cheap bit of tat, but it was only supposed to be a small souvenir – and I knew what I was getting… A cheap camcorder whose USP was you could play “20 interesting games” on it.
So, we enter the shop and I tell the man what I want, he gets it from the window and the sale begins.. I was a bit concerned that he could not figure out how to show me the “games”, (surely a good salesman knows his stock), but I was happy to buy it, he started to wrap it, and took the money off me to go to the till. Now, this is where it all starts to go wrong…………..
He calls me over to the other side of the shop, where my camcorder has been unwrapped and he begins to try to sell me a memory card which I don’t need. I try to explain this, and say we have them at home. He realises then that this is not for a child, and then drags out a totally different machine explaining that I cannot give my husband such rubbish, and “this one is much better, it has 12 megapixels as opposed to this with 3” (on the box the 3 said it has 10) but he would not tell me the price of this better machine, despite being asked on several occasions…
I was beginning to lose my patience and in the end I said that I didn’t want one at all now because it was quite plain he had no intention of selling me the cheaper one - and that I wanted my money back. He said “what money, you haven’t given me money” – I had given him 50 euros. I said I was going to get the Police, at which he laughed and said who did I think the police would believe?! An argument ensued, and he tried to kick us out of his shop – but he picked on the wrong people!!! Another man came out and threatened my mum with violence, and they were extremely intimidating. They were right up in our faces trying to frighten us into leaving quietly. Luckily, because of my shouting a crowd was beginning to form outside this shop and I made sure everyone in shouting distance knew not to buy from this piece of thieving scum. Eventually he gave in and said he would give me my money back after I had “apologised” about what I had said…. The stupid thicko thought my saying the following counted as an endorsement of his shop! Haha……..
"If I say this man is honourable and that he has not stolen 50 euros from me - he will give me it back"
Then I managed to snatch my money back off him – after he had called me, my mum and my daughter a gang of “prostitute bitches”. We then ran like the wind out of this area, and disappeared as quickly as we could before we were murdered in a back lane or something.
My advice – from what I have seen a lot of these electronics shops run this type of scam. The best thing we can do is not buy from them. The shop I visited is in CC Parque Santiago 3 and is a unit called “Local 95”
Another little scam, not quite as dangerous though! - if you go on the little train that does a “loop” of the area, it costs 9 euro for adults, and 5 for children. We were not given a ticket for our child – I think the 5 euro might have gone straight in his pocket – I wonder what would have happened to our ticketless daughter if an Inspector had got on.
